The Jeweler Monk of the Benedictine Order

Theophilus was his name. He lived during the first half of the 12th century in Northwest Germany. He was "the" practicing craftsman and author on goldsmithing of his day. Aside from jewelry and metalworking, he was also an expert on the craft of wall painting, on the making of stained glass, and on the carving of ivory, among other things. So big deal, you say. Right?

Well...not quite. There's a bit of a twist here with ol' Theo. He writes a book about art entitled: "De Diversus Artibus", which, when translated, means "Book of Various Arts". So far we're fine. The guy's literary...and he promotes his works by telling one and all to covet the book with greedy looks, read it thoroughly, and embrace it with ardent love. He's passionate about his work, and he clearly knows how to sell.

When lauding the praises of his work, he goes on to tell one and all that in his book you will discover passages covering whatever knowledge the Greeks possessed in the mixture of colors, whatever knowledge Tuscany had of mosaic work and enameling, whatever knowledge Arabia had in fusion and chasing, all of Italy's wisdom in ornamentation with gold...and on and on...telling the reader how he is able to translate all this knowledge into gold and silver and copper jewelry. The man was clearly brilliant, and had no trouble letting the world know of his genius. So far, he's just like you and me. Ah...but just you wait 'Enry 'Iggins...just you wait.

Theo goes on to describe a goldsmith's workshop. There are bellows, and an anvil, and hammers and even an instrument through which wire is drawn. He's a modern jeweler in a modern age...very much like today's jeweler.

Theo's technique, however, leaves a few questions lingering in the recesses of my goldsmithy's mind. It is with great pride and a swelling chest that Theo discloses a trade secret or two. Listen. The rulers of his time delight in having their gemstones cut in shapes to their liking. And so Theo reveals how it's done. In an act of extreme generosity, he reveals a trade secret. In order to cut these stones, he procures "urinam"--don't know what this is folks, but the rest is clear. He procures urinam with the fresh blood of a lusty goat, fed for a brief period on ivy, and he then cuts the gems with iron while they are bathed in the warm blood of our dearly departed ruminant. Hunh? Hey...Theo! WHAT...are you talking about?

Ah...but it doesn't end here. Theo is also an expert in lapidary techniques, and he advises he students, in another spontaneous act of generosity, on the correct methods of cutting and sculpting. To do this all properly, take a goat--the man clearly had a thing for these animals--but that aside, take the goat, bind his feet--hey Theo...a little S & M bubbele?...cut an opening between the goat's breast and stomach, in the area of the heart, and immerse your gem in the animal's blood till it grows warm. This softens the gem, and you can then take it out and sculpt it till it cools off and hardens, at which point you simply re-immerse in goat's blood...warm it up...and start all over. Oh...Theo....

This continued till you had the shape you wanted, at which point you polished your gem with a cloth till it was nice and shiny and bright, and then sold it to your panting customer, who could barely contain his or her delight at this wondrous gem you've just created. How did you do it, Theo? You simply must tell us.

Theo goes on in his book to explain the recipes required for making glass gems and colorful enamels and ornamental finger rings and so on. Naturally, as a monk, Theo devoted much of his knowledge in producing ecclesiastical jewels...though he had many private patrons as well. I suspect he tried to hide his knowledge behind the above mentioned veils of necromancy...leading his disciples down many a dead-end lane, while he produced his works of art with nary a thought of competition. Of course, this never helped the goat...but it did help Theo achieve, if not fame, then at least notoriety as the prima goldsmith of his day.

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